Monday, October 17, 2011

Strangers In This Land

Sometime I feel guilty for my unexplained unhappiness. I mean I have two adorable, sweet, loving children. A husband that is not always perfect, but loves me dearly with his whole heart. I may not have a whole lot of riches but I have a nice home to live in that keeps us safe and warm. I feel as I have experienced some of the best moments life could offer. Although my extended family is spread far away, they love me and the times we share are grand. Yet why do I go through periods of unrest, discontent, longing for something more? I read something this morning that realeased an unspeakable joy inside of me that I just had to share with my two besty girls. It's not like I haven't heard this concept before, but the way Max Lucado worded this just gave me a better understanding. You see, one of my biggest struggles in life is letting go feelings of guilt. Over mistakes I've made, people I've hurt, not being the best Mom, wife, friend, daugter, etc. And this unhappiness and why I have it occasionally, it's another big guilt for me. So, here's what he said in "Grace for a Moment, A 365 Day Journaling Devotional":

We are not happy here because we are not at home here. We are not happy here because we are not supposed to be happy here. We are "like foreigners and strangers in this world" (1 Peter 2:11)
And you will never be completely happy on earth simply because you were not made for earth. Oh, you will have your moments of joy. You will catch glimpses of light. You will know moments or even days of peace. But they simply do not compare with the happiness that lies ahead.

Earlier he writes:

Unhappiness on earth cultivates a hunger for heaven. By gracing us with a deep dissatisfaction, God holds our attention. The only tragedy, then, is to be satisfied prematurely. To settle for earth to be content in a strange land.....

My kingdom dies not belong to this world. John 18:36

Back to me: You see people always let you down. Even those who love you the most. But this is not it, this life. Thank goodness. I am not satisfied with this just being it. And that is ok. Even though there are people and even things that make me SO happy. There is more and I finally feel it's ok to want more.

I love you girls, I hope this brightens your day a little bit.





Esther

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

1 comment:

  1. i am sorry i am just now reading this. i don't like feeling discontent either but i do and i try hard to make the decision to be happy no matter what but it doesn't always work that way. i to appreciate what great gifts i have been given in this life but know it is not the end all. thank God. i am heaven bound and look forward to reuniting with my dad, your papa who recently went to heaven...his eternal home. also being you all of you eternally is a great comfort to this moma. i love you and hope this revelation to you will ease some of the heaviness you feel at times. i love you with my whole heart but i know there is more.

    ReplyDelete